Time to Take Stock and Be Honest with Yourself

In USA Today, Paul Wilkes has a column about how to be honest with yourself in the New Year. Here are some of his ideas.


Most of us are creatures of habit. One objective is to find and reinforce those habits that enrich our well-being and find and eventually put aside those that are not in alignment with who we really are. Examine your intentions and take responsibility for your own happiness. If you find yourself blaming others for your problems or unhappiness, it may be time to look in the mirror. Take control and responsibility for your happiness. Remember, happiness isn't the goal, it is the result of a life with meaning, engagement, and pleasure. Joy is just around the corner. 

Some possible questions to ask yourself:
  • What did I do that made me happiest?
  • Who makes me feel good about myself when I am with them?
  • Where did I feel ashamed of myself?
  • What action would I do over again and how?
  • What do I look forward to?
  • What are my personal and/or professional goals for 2012?
  • What moves me to action?
  • What habits or tendencies worked for or against me?
  • When did I feel most in alignment with what is best in me?
  • Do I need to make amends with anyone?
  • What am I doing that creates meaning in my life?
 Try this simple form of self-reflection tonight. See where this reflection leads you. Share your thoughts with a best friend or partner to make it real. It just may be time to take action on being and trusting yourself.

You Have a Green Light

2012 Has Promise, but Only If You Take Action!

One of my favorite sayings is, "Love is action, love is a verb, not a noun." This means loving others, loving yourself, loving your work, family and interests. If you view love as a passive or a noun, not much will happen or change in your life.

With the passing of Steve Jobs, much has been written about his positive and negative traits, but there is no controversy about his brilliance and pursuit of perfection.

Steve Jobs learned early that when you don't like how things are in your life or world, change them, either through action or sheer force of will. Some basic beliefs recently printed published in his new book about his philosophy includes the tenants listed below. As you review them, imagine your own life and current circumstances and see how you measure up. It may be time to adopt some of these principles to have a better life in 2012. Look for new ways to create a more fulfilling life. So, Steve Jobs believed in the following:


  • Make your own reality
  • Control everything you can
  • Own your mistakes
  • Don't wait
  • Know yourself
  • Don't hold back
  • Surround yourself with brilliance
  • Build a support team
  • Be yourself
  • Be persuasive
  • Show others the way
  • Trust your instincts
  • Take risks
  • Follow great with great
  • Make tough decisions
  • Find balance
  • Live for today
  • Share your wisdom
Many things are possible, if you can let go of fear.

Creating Positive Memories During the Holidays

It is that time again for wrapping up work and presents. Taking stock of your life goals, achievements, accomplishment and feelings of gratitude or happiness usually happen around the holidays and new year. Be sure to make time for important friends or family by engaging in rituals that provide a sense of meaning to you. Holidays can go from shear panic or feeling overwhelmed to deep comforting memories from your childhood. If you had an intact family with great holiday experiences, this time of year can be grand. If you did not, the holiday time can be dread.

It may be time to reevaluate your perspective about Christmas, New Years and make a shift to create positive memories with new rituals that either enhance your life or create new rituals that help you take charge rewiring your brain and experiences around the holidays. It can be as simple as inviting friends over, to volunteering at a church or shelter or calling family members to wish them a great holiday. This past weekend, we attended the "Lights in the Heights" annual event. Houses are elaborately decorated, bands play, choirs gathered, and thousands of people come out to view the beautifully decorated holiday homes. Private parties were held and people gathered to share food and great conversation. Our friends, Beth and Walter have an annual party at their home with great food and guests. We feel blessed and gratitude to be able to have these times, connections and participate in the festivities. Look around or create some wonderful new memories for yourself.